This past weekend, Logan, Daven and I tried to surprise Logan’s family by going to see them in Oklahoma. (Yes, yet again…more road traveling!) We made it to Oklahoma by about 7:00 pm in huge surprise fashion. Daven’s GrandPa and GrandMama couldn’t have been any happier to see him. And I think he felt the same. They sat and played on the floor with him, while bringing more and more new toys out for him to play with. He was loving every minute of it. We also, of course, got to show off all his new tricks! Those grandparents love new tricks! Daven’s Uncle Billy and Aunt Shayla were also surprised. They too seemed to bring more and more toys out for Daven to play with. Aunt Shayla also got to rock him to sleep while giving him as many hugs and snuggles as she possibly could.

Logan’s parents have been asking to keep Daven for quite some time now. So after many discussions we finally decided that maybe now would be a good time for Daven to stay a few days. After we had an amazing weekend spending lots of quality time with his family we packed our bags to go home. Except this time, we packed Daven a separate bag to stay. After we left instructions on medication, bottle making, emergency contact information, and repeated once more NO MILK…we said our good byes and were off.

Never in my life have I felt such a sense of pain in my chest. I have left Daven many times with my mom but I have never felt the sense of gasping for air. Maybe because it is my mom, maybe because she keeps him on a daily basis, maybe because last time I left for DC Logan was also around. I simply don’t know. But what I do know, is that I have never felt such a heaviness on my chest. I cried the majority of the way home but have only cried once or twice since then.

I have absolute faith in Daven’s GrandPa and GrandMama. I don’t question their parenting or nurturing skills for one second, I think my heart simply aches from missing him so much. The time that Daven is now sharing with his grandparents is such a special time for them both. I am thrilled that we are close enough to make that possible. Daven is so lucky to have both sets of grandparents love him so much! He needs to share as much time with them both as possible.

The plan as of today, is to have them drive Daven home tomorrow. (Wednesday) I know, without a doubt, that I can make it through one more day. Logan and I are going to try and have a date night tonight. Enjoy the time while we can, which I am looking forward to. We don’t get to do that often, so when we do…we try to make the best out of the time we have.

The aching my heart is feeling now, is only natural for a mother to feel. I am sure by the end of his stay, GrandPa and GrandMama are going to be sick of me calling and checking up. HA!

My Sacrifice by Creed

When you are with me
I’m free, I’m careless
I believe
Above all the others
We’ll fly
This brings tears
To my eyes
My sacrifice

We’ve seen our share
Of ups and downs
Oh, how quickly life
Can turn around
In an instant
It feels so good to reunite
Within yourself and
Within your mind
Let’s find peace there

‘Cause when you are with me
I’m free, I’m careless
I believe
Above all the others
We’ll fly
This brings tears
To my eyes
My sacrifice

LOVE LOVE LOVE